Im 21 and over 300 pounds could you please give me some advice?

hi im and 21 years of age and im over 300 pounds. im tired of living my life like this. i am married and of course my husband tells me he likes me the way i am but tells tells me that if i loose weight he'd have to hurt somebody. so that just like telling me that as long as im big no one will want me. i;m tired all the time im depressed and im ready for a change. ive thought about the gastric byp but so many people have died from that surgery and i wanna do this on my on. please help me. i have given up.